There's been an ending in my life. A big and brave one too. It's a separation and it's been painful and as I a sit here against a well chosen oak tree I am between the sun and the moon and my emotions again are somewhere between sorrow and joy.
I saw eleven Magpies here yesterday. I was standing under a tree full of them and I sang to them. I sang way past sorrow and into 'Ma aa aa aag pie ee i eee i eee i ee iee' ..Are you supposed to start again when you get to "seven for a secret never to be told"?
Today there were just two. One after the other. They arrived seperately then stayed together but apart. I stood for a moment between one for sorrow and two for joy. With the position of the sun and the moon, in the context of this strong thread in my life, so meaningful. They have not separated either.
I watched the eclipse from the beginning. The merging was so energetic. There was a feeling of immense pressure and a tangible quivering as the sun and moon came together in an agonising pinky orangey red. Then almost as if it had never happened the new day began. The separation had happened. It had been strangely smooth. Effortless even.
Now I can see both the sun and the moon gazing at each other across the sky . To me they seem pleased with themselves. Still connected, still holding the memory of the intensity of their passionate engagement. Their silent relatedness a comfort.
My physical condition reflects this emotional transition I'm experiencing. A new chapter in my life is begining and I have no idea where I'm going from here. There's inflammation and infection in places. In others it's brittle and shell-like. But in parralel I'm discovering more and more places where it is softer and more supple than before. It's a strange mix all in one body and I'm learning to accept the rough with the smooth.
Song for today. Please copy and paste into your address window :The Mountain by the great PJ Harvey. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mWghMNiJVsY
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