Waiting waiting game..

I thought it might not be so simple getting out of here. Now I have to be 'officially discharged' so I'm waiting for the consultant and his entourage. I've been woken up at 6a.m having not actually gone to sleep until 3.45 ish. They wake you up and ask you if you are alright; it's uncanny how it's always just as you are at that dribbly dropping-off stage. It doesn't matter what time, day or night. Utterly bizarre and very annoying. I've done gentle Yoga and some lovely Chakra energising meditations and I've watched last night's episode of "The Fall" which in my opinion is becoming a bit unfeasable and I've packed my stuff up.

So now I'm waiting to go home..and I certainly won't miss this old view.

I've just been told 'we have no idea when you can go. It will be once the doctor does his rounds but we can't tell you what time that will be.' This is most helpful. Good job I ordered another sumptuous and deliciously nourishing lunch. Another thing I will really miss, the food..

I'm so

tired and very bored.. so it's another boring entry today, sorry about that.

.

Today's song to myself https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QkBUx6Zn6mo

I came, I saw, I conquered !

A bit fresher, getting stronger and stronger, home tomorrow, done with Pnemonia, pah!

playing...

Had a little play yesterday...

Reached the edge, didn't fall in..

I'm getting stronger every day so thought I'd give this a try.

Last monday I was admitted to the CCU unit at Lewisham Hospital with Pnemonia. I'd got into my bed on friday and had just not been able to get out of it. This was following the stimulation of my Thymus gland and the mercury filled tooth extraction both on the Thursday. It had all seemed relatively easy on the day, I even got my hair cut which I have no memory of actually doing, then that night I came down heavily with a relentless cough that just went from bad to worse. I really know the true meaning of the phrase "coughed my guts up" now. By Monday I was in no fit state for anything and I called my sister Sarah for help, who called a doctor, who called an ambulance.

How could things get so bad?..do you know I think I'll have to explain that later, I'm just too tired today, but suffice it to say I was in a very vulnerable state and therefore very prone to infection.
So I've been fighting it hard since then and I've also had to have my wits about me in here because there are alot of unecessary invasive and potentially further damaging 'procedures' that the doctors will try to pressure you into in order to cover their own backs. My older sister Rebecca has been invaluable and so I believe has Courtney White? Thank you so much you two! I'm not exaggerating. For example one night I was told I was going down for "Chemotherapy"! It transpired that it was a case of mistaken identity, I haven't got Cancer, and if I hadn't categorically refused to move, literally clutching onto my blankets for dear life, who knows what would have happened. This wasn't just the once, there's a catalogue.

So now the sun is shining right on me ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! it feels so good. Look at this! I'm going to have to go and soak up some vitamin D now. I will be more detailed in my account of this horrible nightmare soon. I have learned so much more and there are some major life decisions waiting outside for me not too far off, in the wings..Time to unstick myself and breathe in life!

Leopard skin arms, still no offers of help with the shed and 'Super Vet'.

At 4 a.m this morning I was still coughing my guts up. So I was looking for a way to distract myself whilst sitting up because lying down makes it worse. I have discovered 'Supervet'. So now along with my strange new love of 1930's circa figureines I am going to be devouring 'SUPERVET'. He's this vet that re-builds animals with pins and artificial joints etc. It's compelling! (Well for me anyway) It doesn't tax the brain, allows you to release some tears and somehow all this rooting for the animals does distract me. Channel 4 OD love it! Check out Tom the highly strung terrier. http://www.channel4.com/programmes/the-supervet/4od. Is this sad? No! Anyway I don't care! I also watched a very good film with Kirston Dunst and Ryan Gosling. A true story of murder and intrigue.http://www.netflix.com/WiPlayer?movieid=70116678&trkid=13462100&tctx=-99%2C-99%2C6884b39c-712a-4147-b986-9d1364a7f065-80691511

I've mislaid all my cooking skills. I decided to make a lovely warming soup. Just throw it all in. All organic. Parsnip, potatoe, courgette, carot and fennel. Bit of Garlic, small ammount of cumin an onion and lots of parsley.. Sounds good eh? Filthy! Don't know what I did..not nice at all and I now have a vat of it.

Anyway this is a quick one today, my eyes are on stalks. Started a whole new month long programme of homeopathic help that intends to address the fact that I have a malabsorbsion issue with the supplements because the mercury poisoning is over riding the supplements. Please wish me luck with this next chapter.

I've haven't put pen, pencil, brush or stitch to paper canvas or fabric in weeks! Yesterday I made three very thin lines in various shades of red...thats all.

HERE'S AN HOUR OF FUNK FOR YOUR DELECTATION..https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AOroVqxJJ1c

Couldn't have been easier!

Had the extraction yesterday. It was easy as pie. It didn't bleed, it hardly hurt and it is healed over already.I took a new remedy called Emerald, which is all about reminding my body how to let go. I did some very good guided meditations around letting go too. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gHFGqmxqS5kI. I like this guy, no frills and no ego and I really didn't want the dentist's shoe on my chest...

Now, as my lodger pointed out, although it would appear that I'm in a pretty bad way, this proves that my body is in an optimum state of healing. Compared to the mammouth task it is in the middle of this tooth was nothing. This is a great reminder for me. This past week I've been in a very dark place and I don't ever want to go back there. I forgot to be nice to myself, I forgot to thank my body for all of it's hard work. Yes the body, my body definately responds to this chat.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nyCGvmaP78I

Today I discovered a fantastic trick, and one I would have got in no end of trouble with my mum for if I'd been living at home, with the price of fuel what it is nowadays.. I'm such a old biddy these days and I just couldn't get warm. I still had a fever, so I put my dressing gown in the dryer for ten minutes. Putting it on was the most pleasurable experience I've had in a very long time. Warm as toast! Lovely!

I'm still looking for volunteers to help me sort my shed out. Please see the last post and get in touch with me if you are at all game. It's a couple of hours work and would make me so happy! I'm just not able to do it mtself right now and I don't want to loose out on the shed. Come on you lot ! It's a seriously good cause!!!.

Now finally on the THYMUS gland. The one that's caused all the trouble this week. Situated in the middle of the chest, the centre of everything and so so vital to everything. Thank you Sarah for highlighting this for me. After having it stimulated with some accupressure, just a tiny bit mind, I felt as if everything that I've ever been angry about in my life had come back to bite my bum. Ancient and modern stored up swallowed down festering deap feelings that have never been honoured, were very much around. Responses to anger in my family when I was a child were very confusing. I was an angry child and I was punished for it. The message I got was that I was intrinsically bad. Rotten to the core in fact. Nice.If you hold in feelings of this nature if you swallow them whole it effects your entire endochrine system; your liver, your kidneys, your Lymphatic System, your Adrenal glands, your Thyroid, your Thymus your ituitary gland they all serve each other, nothing exists in isolation. Repressing or suppressing feelings effects everything!

http://www.movemoretoday.com/feel-better-thump-your-thymus/ Try this exercise see how you feel afterwards. Also this longer one which really helped me..http://www.angriesout.com/ultimate-anger-release.htm.

My hair is falling out at the moment, quite alot. As you can imagine this is not nice either, so I got it all lopped off today, I also got my eyebrows shaped so I no longer look like Bette Davis before the transformation in 'Now Voyager'. Fantastic film by the way..here's a clip. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2-KGiwGn1d8 I think I look better. That was all of my energy spent for the day.